shaving and exfoliating like what?

This post is dedicated to the glamazeutiful shower I took this morning...lavender sugar salt scrub and all!

This weekend on What Are We Toasting To? (just a random new name for this blog I came up with...do we like it? Is it totally lame? Should I just stick with what I've got??  Let me know in the comments section kthanksssss....) we're talking about when life hands you lemons and you make lemonade and not necessarily because the lemonade is that much better; but because it's more of like - a necessary for your sanity, er - um tastebuds - and you've come to appreciate even the sourness the lemon offers to begin with because well theoretically the lemon is life...sweet bullshit additives such as sugar are not life. Sweet, bullshit, additives like sugar to the lemons of life, are a cover up, they're lipstick, a mockery of the lemon to begin with. Ok - I need less caffeine at night - I digress. And I love lipstick.  Lemons & lemonade and what happens when baby doesn't sleep, and how that can be lemony - which isn't necessarily bad - and how since my son has been born even though it's a helluva an adjustment, I have learned to appreciate so much more than I ever did before - is what's on topic for this here blog post (and I'm taking a breath you should too - that was a lot, and more is coming!).

I love the fact that at 3 months old, my precious bundle, Oliver, is an excellent sleeper - it's like - so so glorious....except for when he's not and it's like - so un-glorious. 
Like everything in this new world of parenting, when it comes to sleep, we have good days and we have bad days. Good days consist of several naps of appropriate length and an easy peasy goodnight lay down session in which he sleeps from around 8:30 pm to 7 am (hallelujah!). But guess what? In order for me to mucho appreciate the good nap days there's just got to be - (cue dramatic music....) DOM DOM DOM (!) -  a  shitty nap day. A shitty nap day means no naps, which equates to lots of fussiness & temporary bouts of smiles which ultimately mean just when I get into his fest of giggles - he erupts into a festival of cries (like out of nowhere - how do they do that?! Like us women, I tell ya...happy one sec and *boom* say/do the wrong thing - pissed the next.) 

Being the active type that I am - before baby, I was nothing if I wasn't doing 30 things in my day. This is no longer the case...and that is because, well - baby. You see when he isn't a happy baby (see shitty nap day), I'm not a happy mom and in order to get by I must consent to let go of whatever plans I thought I had and just let life happen the way it's meant to, sugary-additive free. 

Also Known As: OLIVER RULES (his way or the highway mmmm?)

It's just easier. Easier on him, cause that's how he expects it - and easier on me because I'm not fighting the inevitable. Accepting what is. Coming to this understanding and agreement with myself has made life a lot more simple, let me tell you. Besides, aside from this understanding, I also know that wherever a shitty sleep day lies, an exceptional sleep day follows. And that my friends is something to look forward to. 

~~~~~

T'was Saturday, and the child hadn't slept a wink. He couldn't! There was too much excitement going on in the outside world. His mind wouldn't shut off. Fret not though, I did, as I knew that Sunday, a day of exceptional sleep, lie ahead! And not just a day of exceptional sleep but a day when dad was home. Jimmi could be near should anything go wrong in dreamland and that meant I was free to shower and I will take that sir thankyouverymuch! I remember the feeling I got as I saw what lie in my future. A little slice of paradise was beckoning me from the bathroom. I could almost see the shower and all of the shower accessories - loofahs, smelly soaps, scrubs, and razors, yes even razors - glistening from the nursery as I lay him down for his second nap of the day. I could nearly hear the reflective ding that comes off of crystal champagne glasses when you clink 2 together, as I imagined all of the luxuriousness I was about to embark upon. This was not going to be any 3 minute hose down, oh no - this was going to be a shower MADE FOR A WOMAN. A 15 minute vacation submerging me into a steamy, hair free & smooth abyss of Japanese Cherry Blossom (yes I still use that - does that make me 12? Oh well #simplepleasures) awaited me. And I ceased every. Single. Moment. 


This brings me back to lemons and why it's important to embrace lemons as they are. There is a silver lining, free of sugary additives everywhere - or there can be - if you look for it. As I've said before, I am not one to shy away from celebrations, even if I have to create them. And so I didn't. To all you mommy's or severely time starved people out there: Shower on my friends, shower on.

words: me. melody and likeness:Raffy
(thank you Baby Einstein...)

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Emily  

Get Oot! Get Oot of the Hooose!

Read the title of this post aloud, phonetically, & with gusto...I dare you not to smile 

Do you ever have one of those days (or weeks, or months?) where everything feels off? You feel crooked and irritable? Easily distracted, overly busy, yet accomplishing nothing? I do. I'm just coming out of one of these mini ruts. It started with this years flu virus. Little slap on my wrist for not getting vaccinated [#buzzword] against it. But sue me. I'm pregnant! 

Which BTW - world's GREATEST excuse for everything!!! 

(I suggest using it even if you're not - what are people going to do? Argue with a pregnant woman?)

Oops sorry - pregnant!

Baby please? I'm pregnant!

Why is your slice of cake bigger? I'm the pregnant one!

Anyhoo it was simultaneously too soon and too late to get the shot so I didn't. And I suffered for it. With lingering laryngitis and a golf ball lodged in the nook of my throat -  I was recently suffering from having an off day.  I was home and out of bed but hadn't been out of the house doing anything for what felt like weeks. When the sickness starts to wear off, & television gets old, the mind starts a-wandering & suddenly I find myself in this weird downward spiral of privately owned and operated self deprecation. My thought process goes something like this:

Wow I'm up!
Man I haven't been up in like 6 days
6 days - you're a loser. You weren't even that sick! 
Were you throwing up? No. You slept!
You can't do that when you have a child, let alone a new born - what makes you think you should do it now?
God I'm so lame
What have I done in a week? NO-THING 
I didn't even read a book...I am a waste of space
Why do I even bother? 
With anything?
I should just quit...

Ahhh - repeating my inner thoughts is too depressing...and I must admit - I was feeling it: depressed.  I digress, my point? You see how this trajectory starts? And grows? It's terrible. And if you don't make it a personal mission to stop it - you're screwed up depression creek, binge eating Ben n Jerry's out of the carton and then worst of all - feeling sorry for it later. Binge eating ice cream is sometimes a necessary evil I will never deny anyone of, but feeling sorry for it? SUX. When you're already feeling depressed - feeling sorry for something is the last thing to help your cause. 
You know what fixes it though? It's a depression remedy I SWEAR by. Listen carefully because it's intense. You ready? 
A wonderful cure for that sometimes mild but feels really serious depression is 

GETTING. OUT. OF. THE. HOUSE. 

Mind blown yet? Or as I like to scream in silly collapse worthy laughter with some of my favorite females: GET OOT! GET OOT OF THE HOOSE!!!! 
Saying everything loudly with a hefty Canadian accent makes everything more serious and definitely more fun! 
Whether you are going for an invigorating run, a quick walk around the block, or just a short drive across town, I promise you - you can - and if you really want it - YOU WILL feel better.

So on this particular day of feeling down and out, having an off day, a day of being down in the dumps, I forced it upon myself: 
First I showered & put on clothes (as opposed to pajamas) - ok ok...this feels alright
Then I put on make up - dang girl at least you clean up nice!
I blew my hair dry - alright if nothing else I look good
And I took off in my humble little Prius for some totally boring errands: Post Office, Target (who can really hate on Target though?), various returns, bladdity blah blah. Then I did something kind of crazy - you know, just to spice things up. I rolled down my windows, plugged in my good ol' aux cable and BLASTED some of my favorite sing along music. With me and my eclectic mix of moody Lana Del Rey, falling in love Ed Sheeran, and classic Beatles I hid behind my sunglasses and sang and car-danced as though no one in the world were watching or listening.
AND MAGIC (as per the now nearly expected usual) I FELT BETTER.

Next time you're not feeling like you - try getting oot of the hoose and let me know how it goes!

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Em 

Eyeliner and Granny Panties

It's Valentines Day and to me just another day with a little extra bit of red sprinkled around the day and maybe some flowers if you're lucky. And I like that!  
In the week gearing up for this cheesy albeit Hallmarky (I think they're going out of business?? So sad) type holiday though, I have watched the self loathing pity posts exploding all over social media and you know what? I don't like that. Everyone can have their day of doom. Their moment out of the sun, fine; but, let me offer a different perspective: 

#1. If you're wearing your self loathing pity party anywhere near your sleeve - the rest of the world can smell and feel your desperate lonely self from a short mile away, making your prognosis for nailing down that perfect someone far from a reality. Harsh maybe, but true - lighten up! 

#2. It's just another day! Why go around souring it for everyone else? Pull yourself up and charge ahead - just for today.

#3. Shouldn't we be sharing the love in our hearts with everyone we come across everyday? Maybe those poor souls who don each other with diamonds and luxury limo buses on Valentine's day really just hate each other the rest of the year.  Tell yourself that and move on.
When it comes to that ol' heart of your - don't cry because it's broken or lonely, laugh because you've got one and you can! You're alive and the sun is shining - celebrate that! 

Know that I laugh out loud as I say this and want to assure you it's all in good fun. Just try not to be so sad because you don't have a Valentine. Or because you have to work. Or because you don't have a valentine AND you have to work. Oh the hell. Can you imagine? 

On the contrary to the negative posts, my social media was also filled some great attitudes from single female friends of mine and I had to share their perspectives which is nail-on-the-head what I'm saying. 

"Hilarious! Happy Valentine's Day to the rest of us!"

"Happy Valentine's Day to me! I do it for the chocolate!"

"Happy Valentine's Day to my special boys!!"

Maybe we could all take a hint front these ladies who find the humor, love or appreciation wherever they can and move onward. 
I know I know, I'm married. So who the F am I to say all of this BS about not whining on Valentine's Day? Well I'll tell you.  I'm someone who has shared Valentine's day with the same guy for 10 years. We've had good Valentine's and bad. We've had ones where he didn't even remember what day it was and I was pissed. We have had them when we both worked and didn't celebrate at all. To us it was always just another day. One with a little extra red sprinkled around and maybe some flowers if I was lucky. But I am ok with that and I encourage you to be the same. 
When in doubt do what I did - put on a dress and some eyeliner, grab a partner if you can, and smile pretty for a homemade selfie...what you don't know is I'm wearing flip flops on my feet and granny panties underneath. It's all about perspective my friends.

Eyeliner & Granny Panties

Good Night!

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Em

What true love looks li - BOOBS!

Last week I read a beautiful love story: A couple, Jimmy & Billie Breland, whom had been married for over 60 years, was but 1/2 of what they once were, as Billie passed away and left her husband a widower. Famous amongst her family for once writing special tokens down in form of the note, Billie had recorded quotes, memorable moments, and loving thoughts down forever.  It was a special trait of hers and one that even after she passed away would leave Jimmy feeling warm and still loved by his wife for she had one more surprise up her sleeve. She left a note for Jimmy to find hidden in her checkbook - in which she seemingly spoke to him from beyond the grave and gave him what I can only imagine was solace and comfort ensuring she wasn't far away. She wrote: 

Don't cry because I died! Smile because I lived! 

Know that I am in a happy place! 

Know that we will meet again! 

I'll see you there! 

I read this story and it broke my heart in all the right ways. I love my husband so much and it's only been 10 years - a third of my life! I can't even fathom the love I will have for him after spending twice the amount of time I've lived now, and at that point three fourths of my life, and then living life without him - and it touched me. It moved me to tears. I contemplated for a moment what that must be like. The best I could come up with is it's probably like functioning normally for 50 + years, and then waking up one morning and trying to take a step without your left leg.  It seems impossible because you've lived with this strong and supportive beam for so long and now it's just gone. I don't want to think about it anymore than I have. Not now - not for many many decades to come. We are both happy and healthy and in love and that's it.

Enough of the sap. Sometimes it's hard to love a man! The same man in the same ways day after day. Some days I want to run. Sometimes I want to scream - "ARE YOU ALWAYS GOING TO THINK FARTING IS FUNNY?! LIKE ALWAYS? CAUSE IT'S NOT!" Women want their men to be men when it comes to lifting heavy objects, having a deep stern voice to threaten the bad guys, and of course when it comes to rolling around in bed or on the kitchen table - but we can't stand it when men act like men outside of that. Isn't that funny? When they look at the boobs or ass on another woman, they laugh at dumb humor like Monty Python, or scream at the television during football season while you're trying to have a very subtle conversation about finances, the whole "MAN" thing can be exasperating...Oh us ladies, I'll admit, are so hard to please. My Jimmi has many attributes and habits (I'm assuming) that I would rather know nothing about. "Just do your thing, and I'll do mine," we don't have to discuss and share everything.  

I like to check out the Christian Gryy's of the world, and I know he - the Carmen Electra's - but we don't have to talk about it with each other. There is this man site that he conveniently has an app for and he's on it like I'm on Facebook: TOO MUCH. It's called the Chive. While I'll admit there can be some cute photos of animals here and there, it's mostly a man site filled with photos and videos to entertain the stereo typical man (see boobs, football, beer, 'the gap' ---> if you don't know you don't want to). As I check out thechive.com right now, the top string of photos is appropriately titled "Too Much Silicone or Not Enough?" and the one right after that, "Sooo....you got wasted." 

Being the support beam that he is, Jimmi and I spend a lot of time together. He is always tapping me so I can check out the latest cute, funny or wildly inappropriate photo on his beloved app. Mostly I do appreciate the share, I'm just glad I didn't have to sift through all the cleavage to get there. The other day he taps my shoulder to share and as his eyes are nearly pumping hearts out of them - I'm surprised to learn the share is coming from The Chive. He passes me his phone and I see this: 

the same beautiful note left by Billie Breland to her husband before she passed away. I exclaimed, "I read that on the Today Show last week!" He replied with, "It's just such beautiful story..." And I knew that he meant it. I knew he meant it because he understands true love and the support beam analogy and he knows how much finding this note would mean to him 50+ years from now should I pass away before him. And that to me, is just beautiful. I'll take all of your many habits including boob loving and fart smelling that I must just to hold on to this. Deep down you're a man, a human, my man, and while you may not true love the same way that I true love - you do love and that's what counts...

The en - PECS! 

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,

Em

Turns out I'm growing a penis...

Ha! Made you look - but let's get real I AM growing a penis!! And that is just really bizarre when you think about it.
Yes, on Friday January 9th, Jimmi and I found out we are having a baby boy!

Whether you've been/are pregnant, intend on it, or never plan on it you should know that as soon as the world hears of this news - as a woman you will receive two - which turn out to be VERY redundant - questions:
1.) Are you going to breastfeed? (um hello none of your business?!)

&

2.) Are you going to find out the gender? (um hello why do you care Nosy Rosy?)

From the beginning I always thought it would be fun to carry a somewhat unknown species around for 9 months...making everyone guess what color onesies and binky's to buy IT. I've never been into the super gender specific's anyway - too much of anything (see baby pink or baby blue) makes me gag.  But Jimmi had other plans. He said he knows me and I'd NEVER be able to pull off holding out until delivery to find out the gender - that it would drive me Crazy McCrazerson NOT to know...but lezbreal - he was totally reflecting his own impatient apprehension onto little ol' me!
So long ago we decided that when the time came we would find out.

In order to keep somewhat of the surprise though, we (I) decided to notify the Dr.'s office that if they were able to detect any specifics, to keep it to themselves and call our bakery with the news. 

yah - I have a bakery. 

Cause you know,  that's how we do it in LA: 

My bakery, my masseuse, my stylist, my yoga instructor, 

 My psychic, my pet's psychic, etc! 

I called ahead to Susie Cakes (see BEST cupcakes eVer) to place my very large order of 2 cupcakes. Depending on what the Dr.'s office told them, they would fill the cupcakes with the appropriate colored icing and bada bing - upon receipt of these tasty treats, we could have our own gender revealing party thereby maximizing blue and pink buying power.

So after a long work week, Jimmi and I headed over to the OB's office for the moment of truth. Gender revealing or not, it's always fun to get to see the little alien's face as he grows inside of you. The Dr., his PA student, my love, and I all marveled how little "Henry" was sucking his thumb, and while we did so - he promptly removed his thumb and stuck out his tongue revealing if nothing else, the kid's got sass!  The next hour found us first at the bakery to retrieve our cupcakes and then at dinner. We found a small and very busy hamburger stand (I can't get enough cheeseburgers!) by the house and amidst the hustle and bustle that a place like this brings on a Friday night, got lost in each other for another one of life's simply perfect pleasures.

After stuffing our faces with gooey cheese and too many versions of french fries, it was time for dessert. We grabbed a waiter and explained the situation asking him to take some photos of the process. As we bit into our cupcakes we were both fairly certain of the outcome but it wasn't until we peeked at the blue frosting we knew for sure. The feeling was unreal, emotional, and so exciting all at the same time.
No "official" announcement has been made, but those we have told, ask if we're happy it's a boy? To that I say, "Of course I am!" Really, we're just happy he exists. I'm elated he's healthy and sassy, and surviving inside of me. Penis or vagina he is ours. He is something we created and eventually he's going to be a crazy little man who loves dirt or dolls and we're going to love him more everyday.
Some people make this moment a surprise in the delivery room, others choose to have a big party & reveal the news to everyone, some go cheap and buy 2 cupcakes to celebrate quietly together - no matter what you do or how you do it - just CELEBRATE it. Life is full of too many what if's and scary moments and judgement not to celebrate every body part, every smile, every occasion, every chance we get. And so we did.
Oh did I mention I'm growing a penis inside of me?? How many people can say that?

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Em

This photo captures it perfectly

Simply date night

When you're in good company - it doesn't matter what you do.

The quality time I spend with my husband is a perfect example of this. Quality time can be hard to come by but if you make a real effort I promise, it's totally possible. Tuesday has been dubbed date night in my home since last April. 

And we are religious about it. 

Life is so busy and there's that 'always something' that makes it so hard to concentrate on ourselves as a couple. So we decided to set one atypical night a week aside (thank you therapy!) for just us: Tuesday! No friends. No appointments. No parties. No RSVP's. 

Nothing but the two of us. And my favorite part of this deal is since the only stipulation is that it's just us - date night can be anything. It can be exciting and planned, like attending a concert or play or a nice dinner out at one of our favorite sit down restaurants. You know, one of those dinners where you eat at the restaurant. They seat you and bring menus. Menus which are ultimately followed with the servers bringing you several courses over a lengthy period of time; a dinner where you're not rushing and have time to explore the menu, banter with the waitress, gaze into one another's eyes...

Or date night can be as simple as agreeing to avoid the afore mentioned chaos: the dressing up, making reservations, choosing the event, getting there. As fun as those action items can be - they can be exhausting (and expensive!). Agreeing to make speedy chili together whilst watching some crappy reality show can be just as rewarding; sometimes even more so. The time saved on zipping into a tight dress is reward in itself while we pad around in slippers and elastic; with ultimate plans to end of up naked on the couch.

One of our most memorable date nights consisted of me accompanying Jimmi to Costco while he picked up some new contacts. As we were leaving the store, their pizza slices started calling my pregnant self - almost by name! And just like that: date night became all about people watching while we stuffed our faces with greasy, cheesy pizza and splurged on Costco's fro yo swirl. A date night costing some $7 and change; and we observed, giggled and enjoyed every minute of the night, proving nothing fancy, expensive or elaborate had to be done.

Taking ourselves extremely serious during a romantic Costco dinner

Just so long as we had each other, we were satisfied. More than satisfied. And it left me wanting more. 

Ah the power of good company; it really makes you see how beautiful the little things are.  I am so grateful for all of it. Are you?  

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,

Emily 

Clutter isn't clutter... if it has a space (on displaying kitchen knick-knacks)

You may be starting to catch on to this but I love little things!

As a baker, unique-albeit-misc-decorative/mini-utensils often find themselves in my hands in the form of a gift. Now don't get me wrong, I love a gift (surprises, clothing accessories, surprises, treats, certificates, wrapped/unwrapped etc.); but I have a really hard time with items I can't use! You see, I can't stand clutter. The older I get & the more pregnant I become - the less space it seems we have in this humble abode we call our own. It's for this reason, I have recently taken up the hobby of shall we say, nesting (?). This hobby of mine has caused me to purge every closet, every shelf, every drawer in the entire house, of everything we don't need/haven't used in a year +. I subjected my Jimmi to the cleansing process as well,  and although he isn't one for too much stuff either, it was to my surprise he  jumped in with both feet: hosting a garage sale, posting furniture for sale up on Craigslist, parting with too-holey band T's I had mentally just agreed to in order to avoid bargaining.

Anyhoo, I digress, despite all of this purging action, we still have our fair share of things, knick-knacks if you will. Including those pesky (and darn cute!) unique-albeit-misc-decorative/mini-utensils. 

They don't fit properly in any drawer, we aren't using them so I'm not cluttering my work space with them but I can't give them away...so CLUTTER NOT! I intelligently decided that if it can't be clutter if it has a space - but the catch: You've got to create the space. The Series Winning Catch? You've got to create the space timely fashion...timely enough so these little items don't circle back around for the next garage sale - or in my case - before the baby comes!

So I invested a few bucks (10) into this Tool Rack from OXO (found at Bed Bath and Beyond)or for me: A Knick-Knack rack 

Once it's here and the Knick-Knacks are officially in their space - I will post an update! 

Here's to a clutter free life and the little things!

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,

Em

Lewis = mine

I am enamored by the little things...

The little things make my life 

For instance I LOVE my last name. Funny - but true. My maiden name is Oehler and my entire life no one could ever spell my last name, much less pronounce it. For years I've taken my federal chances by opening mail addressed to Emily Dehler, Choiler, or O'heller and time and time again have responded to strangers trying with everything from Oleander to Oiler. 

"How exotic!" "How Foreign!" you might think...but No-notsomuch.
Now that I'm married to one of the world's sweetest not to mention handsomest men, Mr. Jimmi Lewis, I get a weird little high every time I get to share my last name and the person on the receiving end spells or says it correctly.

See? It really is the little things.

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Em

Intro to this blog & me

My name is Emily Lewis I am a retired nanny, with plans to be a financially- successful-entrepreneur, and writer as I push through my quest to be ok with imperfection.

I am preparing for the birth of my first child by pinning nursery pins (in primary colors!), scheduling hard-wood floor refinishes, sticking to the self induced family budget and having dreams of our fixer upper home suddenly affording the budget to rival June Cleaver's story book abode. As seems to be the cycle of life, I am in full life-transition mode and the whole darn picture is my Something to Look Forward to.  

For years, I have been tormented by my own visions of perfection i.e. Life living,  recipe creating, personal workout level, BLOG WRITING; and while I frequently pretend to write by doing so in my head, I have never felt worthy enough of actually sharing my experiences. As I grow older though;  I realize these 'something to look forward too's' of life are made up of a series of little things. Those are MY experiences and it's time I appreciate this simply wonderful life of mine.

I've always been really good at enjoying life but I have a history of doing so in hindsight.  I have a great amazing time doing anything simple like going for an adventurous drive - adventurous being a simple added element like stopping at  In-n-Out on the way; but I tend to do the enjoying later while I'm retelling the story or reminiscing via my iPhone photos. On the surface I'm usually concerned with logistics or my 28th calorie splurge of the week...

Join me as I as I finally start to grow up, live in the moment, and really hone in on life's simple pleasures, the little things.  Here's to all of our journey as the Not so Perfect Wife Perfect Life and the beauty in all that is.

...and her life was Simply wonderful

All my very best,
Em